Listening Before Judging

Since my perspective is from the majority culture, I am realizing what a rare gift it is when I get the opportunity to hear the HONEST experience of somebody from a minority culture. When I do get that rare opportunity, here are the movements my mind goes through:

 

1. I have to work hard to resist the temptation to make sweeping generalizations and judgments instead of sitting with the real, lived experience of an actual human being.

 

2. When I listen to someone's real, lived experience and how the system that benefits me oppresses them, I get defensive. Sometimes that makes me want to jump in and try to quickly offer help, other times it makes me want to retreat and go silent. Neither option is helpful. And so I need to remember to listen, listen, listen.

 

3. I'm not nearly as woke as I think I am, and pretending that I am is patronizing.

 

4. The only way to see what I don't currently see regarding my own privilege is when someone from a minority culture has the grace, humility, and patience to sit and help me see. But, I am also realizing that it can be incredibly exhausting to POC when well-intentioned white guys like me ask for time and energy from them.

 

Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy. Lord, have mercy.

Photo by Ihor Malytskyi on Unsplash